Holly Theisen-Jones wrote a viral piece on wellness-industry influencers for McSweeney' s in 2017 called " My Fully Optimized Life Allows Me Ample Time to Optimize Yours" and was subsequently shocked by people' s inability to distinguish satire from reality after she was offered contracts as a life coach, invited to contribute to wellness blogs, and even asked to speak at events. As she says, " At first, it was funny. Then it was scary. " During a brief, unimpressive career in horticulture, Holly learned that she is to tropical plants as Charlie Brown is to Christmas trees and switched careers to human services. If plant murder were a crime, she would be on the way to Venezuela. She lives in Atlanta with her husband, child, six frogs, and a house full of plastic succulents.
