As a child, Gina Cascone would hide under her bed, in the closet, and run away from her parents, hoping somehow to escape her worst fear. But she couldn't hide from the awful truth...
She had to go to Catholic school.
Do nuns have legs? Is Original Sin the "starter sin" for novices? Can the rosary be said in under fifteen minutes? These are some of the questions that vex young Gina Cascone as she makes her way, grade by grade -- and prayer by prayer -- through the rigors of a Catholic education. All the answers can be found in this hilarious classic of childhood foibles: the traumatic first day of school, the dorky plaid uniform complete with matching beanie, glow-in-the-dark rosary beads, first confession trauma, proper dashboard decor ("Cadillacs got Jesus; Oldsmobiles got Mary"), and the race to save the most "pagan babies," who weren't lucky enough to be born Catholic and American.
Inhaltsverzeichnis
Contents
1. Catholic Kids Make Great Faces
2. Creatures of Habit
3. Don't Drink the Holy Water
4. Bless Me, Father, for I Am Sinning
5. Ashes and Sackcloth
6. How to Get Holy Communion off the Roof of Your Mouth
7. All Things Considered, I'd Rather Be in Limbo
8. Pagan Babies
9. Holy Propaganda
10. Martyrmania
11. How Do You Know You've Been Blessed with a Baby and Other Religious Questions the Nuns Wouldn't Answer
12. The Rosary in under Fifteen Minutes
13. The Dashboard Navigator
14. Get a Piece of the Pope
15. What Do You Buy a Nun for Christmas?
16. What Did You Give Up for Lent?
17. The May Crowning
18. Sister Was Not Impressed When She Found Me Reading The Confessions of Saint Augustine
19. The Pink Slip from the Rome Office
20. The Pilgrimage
21. "Don't Forget to Say a Prayer for Me!"
